Oh Canada!

Our home and and native land, something something something, something something something. Although I'm confused. I thought it was the "native american's" land. And if so, what are they doing in Canda for Zeus' sake? I mean, it seems a bit silly. Oh, I suppose you can argue that yes, it is North America but everybody knows that "America" is slang for USA. Try using it in some other fashion (even out of country) and I'll bet you have some confused people. Anyway, my summations are as follows after my brief exposure. 1. People are fairly nice. I mean compared to New Yorkers who I interacted with yesterday. But heck, everybody is nice compared to New Yorkers. I bet the Taliban are of a sweeter disposition than NY'ers. OK, maybe that's not super fair. I really only interacted with a few yelling at us where to park. They actually had people flagging us away from the park parking lot. I didn't realize that's what they were doing until later. I would've been highly irritated (slightly above my normal state) but they did save us $5 and we didn't have to walk that much farther. So, Arrogant New Yorkers: 1. But then Rebekah and I hunted down a Pita Gourmet so we could get some Gyros. The Chick taking our order was rude to everybody. Irritated Tourist: 1. But then, the guys making the food did an awesome job and went out of our way to be very considerate. So much so that I told the guy he was "awesome." I bet you don't get told that everyday by a stranger do you? So, all in all I like New York better.

Our trip has been enjoyable but expensive. Our hotel was a good deal and is nice. But prices at the Denny's next door are literally twice what we pay at home. So, we haven't been to Denny's yet. Add tip and taxes (about 20%) and most meals are around $40. thankfully, we've avoided most of the tourist traps, so our meals have been good. We did find free refills at a fast food joint and there was one family restaurant that was advertising free refills. It's amazing to me how much being able to drink four cups of coffee or three glasses of iced tea means to me when I can't have it.

We went over to the US side yesterday. That was interesting. The border guard asked specific questions which were polite but a little unnerving. I forgot our hotel's name for a minute, but Rebekah knew it. Coming back though was a little odder. The Canadian dude was very cool. Wanted to know why we went over the US side. all reasonable questions, just a little hostile. maybe he doesn't like americans. Wouldn't surprise me.

So, last day of away from kids vacation. gonna check out a cable car ride. Ideally, the cables are nice and sturdy. If not, I love you Mom and Dad. Have fun with the kids!

Moving right along

Well, today didn't quite turn out the way I expected but it went well anyway. I had planned for something to break up the routine of the day but that fell through. So, I finished some cosmetic issues with the sink, watched a couple movies and then, finally, got to work on hooking up the swamp cooler. It was pretty easy to hook up the evaporative cooler to the thermostat. All I need to do now is figure out where to put the thermostat in the house. Since all I have to do is run one wire (with 4 small wires in that one) to a suitable location. I hadn't eaten much all day except for some cheetos in the morning (shhh. don't tell my Dad. that's one of his pet peeves :) but finally cooked up some corn dogs. That's the extent of my cooking. I have fish sticks but don't want to use the oven. Takes too long and that sucker has burned me before. So, now I"m sitting here kind of bleary eyed watching Glengary Glen Ross which is supposed to be fantastic. It's about real-estate. But I like to think that I can enjoy a thinking mans movie. Although I'm not sure how watching a bunch of cranky salesmen having a bad-luck streak is haute couture. Well, that's probably a misuse of a stupid French term, but you get the idea. Anywho, I guess things are still going well for Rebekah and the kids. Lots of fun. Cell service is not so good at the house. It's got a metal roof and the exterior is stone so that pretty much bounces all cell signals off. When i talked to her a bit ago she was outside sitting on the swing. Then her phone was running out of juice so she had to go. I'm starting to get suspicious. I guess the shoe is on the other foot a bit. Normally, she wants to talk to me but I'm at work and busy. Well, Church is tomorrow and unfortunately so is Father's day. I don't normally care or pay any attention to it, but apparently other people do. I guess that's all for now.

One week down (almost)

Rebekah has been gone for almost a week. I am sitting here watching a movie after spending my third evening working on putting in a new (well, salvaged) sink It's finally done. I hope. Took me the better part of eight hours which sounds ridiculous. If you look at those DIY books they might say two hours. Well, let me tell you something. It might take you two hours if you know exactly where all your tools are. It might take you only two hours if you have a replacement sink that fits the existing hole perfectly (I didn't). It might take you only two hours if you didn't have to spend an hour chiselling caulk off. It might take you only two hours if the "new" sink wasn't tweaked and you didn't have to try to bend it, fit it, bend it, fit it, bend it, fit it, bend it, fit it, and then say "fugedaboutit" and call it good enuf. It might take you only two hours if you had all necessary sink lugs/clips and some idea on how to use them. It might take you two hours if you didn't keep dropping the sink clips. It might take you only two hours if you didn't have some clips that were straight drive and new clips that were phillips so you had to switch back and forth. It might take you only two hours if you didn't have... oh I give up. You get the idea.

This week hasn't been too bad. A bit lonely but I've kept busy with the sink project and life in general. I've stayed busy and work so between the two it hasn't been as bad as I expected. I don't miss the kids as much unless I actually see some wee ones on TV or something. I'm very good at being oblivous, so I am leveraging this expertise to the hilt. I think I have some entertainment plans tomorrow so after I verify the sink is good I'll tear into my swamp cooler. Our old one of probably 50 years or so finally could not be patched any more. So, I'm hooking up another one that someone gave us a few years ago. This wouldn't be a big deal, but I bought a thermostat for it on clearance and it's pretty sophisticated. It'll auto turn on and switch from cool to fan and it'll handle both speeds. So, it's pretty cool but it's a project for sure.

Somehow Rebekah made it to Michigan alive. I guess the kids did pretty well which is a major blessing. But because they did two crazy long days (not consecutive thankfully) she was really exhausted.

ok, well, that's my check in for now. I'm ready to pass out, so i'm gonna put the computer down before it falls on the floor.

Stress

I feel myself growing older. Work has been very stressful and isn't showing any sign of letting up. Rebekah and the kids are leaving soon which I'm not very thrilled about. I think most husbands would be thrilled to have the house to themselves for two weeks. I've got lots of things to do that are frustrating to work on around kids, but I'm not sure which to focus on. Do I work upstairs on my bathroom project which has been largely on hold for the past two months? Or work on miscellaneous household items? Or this, or that? I'll figure something out. I spent the biggest chunk of today putting in a pulpit mic at church. Cutting holes in a $2000 pulpit makes me nervous. I also had to splice some pieces together, but I think the end result is quality and looks well. Doesn't work, but hey, it looks good. No, it works, but we need an off switch for the pulpit mic. didn't even think about that until Pastor mentioned it. Oh well, he just have to move it out of the way when he talks. The pulpit mic is for me and my glorious voice as I lead the congregation in singing. Without me, they would mill about like cats. Yes, I am the cat whisperer. Or herder. Or something. I'm quite tired right now and watching "Men who stare at Goats." Well, I'm more listening to it because it's hard to think creatively while watching a movie. Oh, and point of accuracy regarding this movie-if you're supposedly in Iraq and you steal an old pickup it will NOT be one of the big three. It will be a Nissan or some other product of Godzilla's home town NOT Motor City. Watch the news sometime. I'm right.

Will someone tell my wife to stop harassing me? I give up.

I vant to suck your bloood!

Went to Dr. today for a variety of reasons. But, the fun part is always getting my blood sucked out. I should really ask for it back when they're done, but I have a hunch they'd give me a strange look and then say, "Are you kidding me?" At which point, I'd have to smile and say "Of course! nobody would seriously ask such a thing." All the while plotting their demise for making me feel stupid for wanting part of me back. While I was in the office today the Dr. was tapping on my face (don't ask) and I was thinking that my mom (when I was lil) my wife (when I was big) and my Dr. (lil and big) all get to invade that private space where I (we) normally scream out "No touchie!" But now, we can add the wonderful folks at the TSA. I am looking forward to flying in June.

Springtime. Sheesh. Rough spring. Winds so strong that I occasionally have to chase my kids down as they start blowing away. Today it was 80 degrees and people were complaining. I like hot. hot doesn't cost me money. cold costs me money. If you're hot take your clothes off. Close the curtains though, cause you don't want to have to register as a sex offender. Then if you're still hot, get an ice cube and rub it up and down between your WOOPS! Sorry, got a little carried away there. Too busy getting ready for stuff. sometimes my brain gets tired and wanders off where it shouldn't.

In about 4 weeks the fam is leaving for Michigan. God speed I say. I will be alone for two weeks and then I (hopefully) will fly to Detroit and meet Rebekah. Then we will go to Niagra falls via Canadia. What about the kids? We're boarding them. Why niagra falls? Cause. that's why. Will I be lonely while they're gone? Sure, but I can blast music loud. Watch movies loud. Whatever whatever loud. OH, and I have a class and a test to take while they're gone so I'm planning on cramming my brain full of tech knowledge that will be out of date within a couple months.

Oh, and I am doing a customer presentation at a local user group. There's only about 100 people there. I hope I'm not nervous. I have decided that the best way to not be nervous is to simply not give a flying rutabaga. Forget this preparation thing. I'll psych myself out if I do that.

I need to find a hobby. this life thing is burning me out.

stabby stabby

So, there I was in Home Depot, and I'm going through Dexter withdrawals and I just had to see some blood and nobody else was in the aisle so, sigh, i was forced to go all stabby on myself. Not my prefered outlet, but much less prison time go I guess it was a win-win after all. In truth, I was trying to unscrew a setscrew from an ancient door-knob and the screw was, well, less than its self (translation: it was half broken). And of course, I was using my knife as a screwdriver which doesn't sound quite as stupid as you might think. Anywho, push came to shove and I pushed hard and shoved the knife right off the screw into the "meaty" part of my left hand. My first thought was "#!@." My second thought was "Dang, that blood is dark." My third thought was "Dang, I hope I don't faint." My fifth thought was, "What kind of wuss faints at a little blood?" My sixth thought was, "How'd I get down here?" Ok, not really. I didn't faint, but I did feel a little woozy as it was late in the day and I hadn't had lunch yet. So, tried to cup my hand to keep the blood from spilling and getting biohazard response from a bunch of orange-aproned dudes yelling "Swarm Swarm!" I scurried to the bathroom as casually as one can when one is scurrying while holding a handful of blood and burst into the mens room only to find NO PAPER TOWELS! Argh! They had those stupid commie hand dryers. That's great if I want to redecorate the bathroom in a red mist but my goal was containment, not spreading the crimson contagion. So, after spinning around wildly I go to a stall and quickly debate of trying to spin enough paper off those toilet paper misers or grab one of those sani-thingies for the toilet. I decide on the sani-thingy and use it to staunch the flow of blood. Then I wandered over to a nest of aprons and thankfully got a guy who wordless got my band-aid. And then, some women saw me. Thankfully, my tough exterior kept them from voicing their concern to a minimum. Although, as I was walking around later a woman asked me how my hand was. As far as I know I was able to capture all of it but for a couple drops which I cleaned up later. Then I gave up and went and bought a new door knob. So ended my adventure @ home depot.

3 little piggies

I mean daughters. and in no way am i implying that they're pigs. Well, libby likes her Ramen but not a pig by any means. So, I am watching Dexter, ya know the show about the happy go lucky serial killer, Well, not happy go lucky but a serial killer with a heart. Well, not that either. Ok, well, all the judging aside on why I'm watching such a sick show (try it, I dare you) I was watching an episode and a guy (not Dexter) told his daughter that he wished she'd never been born. And wouldn't you know it, I found some emotions. Buried underneath some peanut shells (i was snacking earlier) I found something kind of shriveled and dried up. I think it's an emotion, not really sure. But I felt some weird pang when I picked it up. Not sure what it was for sure, but I suddenly felt a compelling need to go hug my daughters. So I went upstairs in the dark. I went in the girls room and I could hear Liberty and Serenity but then I felt some little creature near my feet grabbing at me. I leaned down (I can't see anything mind you) and felt around and found some hair and then a little face and then some arms. So I picked her up and then I could tell for sure it was a Trinity! Needless to say I then went and sat down on the bed and hugged and kissed all the girls until that first emotion thingy went away.

Tough Enough

So, time seems to speed up as you get older. I just turned 35. I wish I didn't feel old, but I have ever since I turned 30. I started having problems with my wrists about that time so this marks the 5 year mark of wrist pain. I think it's tendinitis in the wrists w/ inflammation but all Dr.'s want to see is carpal tunnel even though the symptoms are wrong. Nobody once suggested tendinitis even though the symptoms fit. anyway, I just pray it doesn't get any worse.

Well, we got a new pastor for our church. Our last one, my brother in law, left about 6 months ago. Thankfully we had a guy to preach who is very good. The new guy is ex-USAF so he's got a pension which is a huge relief. We will still be tight on things financially @ the church though because we are losing one family. But, it's God's church and I just have to figure out how I fit into that properly.

Trinity burned herself today on our wood stove. Out of all the kids, she was the last I would've suspected. But, she backed into it and fell down. Her burn is pretty bad, but I came home from work and helped Rebekah put Vitamin E on it and it doesn't seem to be hurting her too much. She's such a sweety. She will just sit with me for what seems like hours. Forrest has said to me that I love her the most. No, I don't, although I may show her the most affection. But that's simply because she is the sweetest. "like" is relative and I like some of my kids more than others at different times. But I try to not favor one and if I have been spending more time with the girls and Clell. Titus is probably getting the short end, but to be honest he is more interested in watching TV than saying goodbye when I'm leaving. But that's ok, he's a kid. He's a good kid and he loves to help me do things. I caught him upstairs in the bathroom after light's out and he was "cleaning." So, I told him good job, pointed somethings out to him that he could work on and left him.

Several people have told me that this is the best time of my life. This may be true, but I've heard from other people that College was the best time of their life. I haven't had the best "time" of my life yet that I know of. I love my family, but Rebekah and I are beaten down with trying to take care of them, our old ancient house and property, our vehicles, friendships, and the the church. I really hope this isn't the best time of my life, but if it is then I'm grateful because although life is challenging I have never been so happy.

Why do today what you can do tomorrow?

I've been pondering doing this for a long time now (over a year). I thought I'd do a blog post for each one of my siblings and how they'd each played a part in my life. It's a tricky thing to do because I don't like to go back and rehash many of these memories because, well, I'm a guy. But, I shall try and hopefully, even though this is in the ether it will live on somehow, somewhere after the zombie apocalypse.

Down with the sickness

About every 3 years our whole family gets sick. This Christmas time we won the lottery of illness. The boys got sick first, I came down with a fever before Christmas but didn't get really sick until a few days after Christmas. Trin got sick somewhere between those two aforementioned times. She was so sick rebekah took her to doctor. Trin was dehydrated but they weren't much help other than to tell us that she didn't have anything they could help with. It was difficult because Trin wouldn't drink, eat, take medicine or sleep. One of us had to hold her all the time. It's hard to put into words how impressed I am with Rebekah during these times. She soldiers on with no complaining through these extremely arduous times. She asks virtually nothing of me if she can do it. Sometimes, but not often, I realize that she really needs help and I give it without asking. But because of how tough and capable she is when she does ask for help I try to never complain because I know she needs it.

It's the girl's birthday today. They are still young enough I would like to wait until we feel better but that's probably not the best attitude. the days blur together being sick. Dad always said that you wouldn't feel any worse getting up and doing stuff than you do lying in bed. Probably true. yesterday I forced myself to move an electrical outlet. I felt better then than I do now. I've just been lying in my chair watching zombie and post-apocalyptic tv. of course, that would make anybody feel sick right? Try eating pizza while watching a zombie flick? yech!

Our pump house froze sometime during the night. thankfully, it happened once before so I knew what to do to fix it. Rebekah and I went out and I climbed down into the where the sensor is for the pressure tank. it has a tiny little hose that needs to remain unfrozen. So, with some thawing of the line w/ a heat gun it finally turned the pump on again. We have a heater down there to help avoid such inconveniences, but I wasn't paying attention and didn't plug it in. It's been a hard winter so far, and I desperately want the bad parts to be over (heavy snow, below freezing temps). But I need to adjust my mindset.

well, this sicky is gonna go take a shower.

People say it gets easier

It's getting worse. As the babies get more and more mobile, the stresses increase. Right now Liberty is quite literally screaming because Trinity won't stay in bed. Clell won't stay in his bed either, but he's in a room with Titus, so that's not as huge a deal. I take one step forward and two steps back on my bathroom project. Finish work eats me alive. I'm not skilled at it and it's so time consuming for me. Then, a little girl puts glue on one of my boards and sticks a painted board onto it. I don't notice so when I go to work with it I find that it takes the strength of a gorilla to pry it apart and some of board goes with it. I guess that's why they call it gorilla glue. Of course, my babies can rip the bezel off of my media center pc that is glued on with the same glue....

Sigh. some days are harder than others, that's for sure. Usually rebekah and I make a good team, but occasionally we both hit our limit. Mine is much lower than hers and gets hit on an almost daily basis, so I guess it's really more a factor of Rebekah hitting her limit at the same time I've hit mine. I'm not trying to complain about the situation, just document. Maybe I can guilt my kids into letting me live in their guest house when i'm old and infirm. I wonder if my kids will be rich when I'm 50? STOP LAUGHING.

Well, take care. And If you see us on the evening news, please don't say "they were such nice people. I never saw it coming."

I'm hurt

not a single person called 911. I could still be stuck under there for all you know. I mean, don't you have a heart? <sigh>. Well, I made it out of the crawlspace. I was victorious. Almost 10 years of mediocre drainage were put to death by a swift (well, 2 hours) of determined plumbage. I tried to plan for all contingencies since it's so miserably hard to move around down there. I bought a couple different elbows and cut a couple different sizes of pipe to join in so I had 2 different heights and 2 different lengths. Well, 3 if you count the other elbow. Actually, I think I had more than that. let me think. Wow, that's actually a lot of combinations. I'm pretty smart. But when you're down under your house you have to live by your wits. Anywho, it was challenging to cut the pipe fitting off due to the cramped space but I managed it. I had to get kind of intimate with the main drain line but it was cool cause we had dinner first. After I cut the fitting off, I eyeballed it and yep, there was a bunch of gunk in there. But, when I tried to clean out the stub piece that went into the main drain I discovered that it was pretty much totally gummed up. I had to have one of my boys bring me a drill and use that to power through. There was definitely some rust, but after some drilling, jabbing, swearing, and poking I got it cleaned out. I then put the new fitting in and use the fernco couplers to get it all nice and snug. Was a little bit looser than I liked, but I reefed on it until it seemed nice and tight. Rebekah ran the water and no leak! wow. I topped off my final (i hope) excursion by putting a little sensor by the mainline to detect any water leaks. Kind of neat and for only $10 at home depot I think it's a good idea. The main line has a patch on it and it's seeping a tiny amount. At least this way if it gets worse I should find out before the house floats away.

Fat bottomed girls...

...you make the rockin' world go round. Inappropriate? Yes. Offensive? Possibly. Funny? Absolutely. I mention this because Rebekah woke me up this morning by bringing Trin in to see me and for some reason I turned on the radio. Maybe to see her dance a little. maybe to wake me up. Not really sure. Don't really care. But there I was playing with Trin (and baby Clell made an appearance too) and the song "Fat Bottomed Girls" by Queen came on the radio. Needless to say this song has given me much amusement over the years and has provided an auspicious start to a day when I have much to do and little sleep on which to do it. I went and played a couple board games with some guys last night which might seem a little lame but is actually quite fun. The most unique game involved cars and violence. The goal was to score the most points in the bloodiest and most appalling way possible. Hitting organic speed bumps (ahem, pedestrians) was first and foremost on everybody's mind. Of course, they're slippery little buggers so it's easier said than done. And what would a violent game be without the opportunity to shoot your fellow players (or flame throw, or land mine, or ram) and wipe-out as you head around turns? Of course, it's modeled on real life where when you crash you get to start over after giving up an accessory card, and taking a minus to your points. I will tell you this, it was a lot more fun driving home later. Unfortunately, somebody must have been through ahead of me because I couldn't find any moving speed bumps to hit. . Last place in life AND in the game.

There I was...

...holding my jigsaw with pumpkin guts all over me and the saw. My memory was fuzzy. I looked down and in horror saw 4 dead pumpkins. The oldest was obviously a victim of my saw but what about the others? What happened? I started to think back...

It was a brisk autumn day and I decided that I was going to somewhat celebrate the pagan holiday of all pagan holidays-Halloween. But, knowing that i was far too lazy to wander around in the dark w/ my kids I decided to start small and just get some pumpkins. I rushed home from work and picked up my two boys who eagerly had been asking about halloween even though we've never done anything before. We made the quick trip over to the produce stand (on steroids) and proceeded to wander around in the cold not knowing what to do. I prefer my food to be dead, cooked and on my plate. This was a new experience. Finally I asked someone about pumpkins. After giving me a stare usually reserved for dudes and deadbeats, she gave me the low down. If we wanted to, we could take a hay ride out to the pumpkin patch and get sweet, juciy, ripe, and beautiful pumpkins there or we could look at a pile of mangy cast-offs. I chose the castoffs. I let the boys pick their pumpkins (of course I had veto power) and then I picked a couple baby ones for the girls. When we got home we started the messy business. I started Titus off first and while he was disemboweling his, I did the two girls baby 'kins. Typical girls. did not want to get their hands dirty. Finally, I got to Forrest's 'kin. I thought it odd that his had a different texture but didn't pay much attention until later. I tried using the same knives on his pumpkin only to bend them. Finally I had a hole in it but cutting was a nightmare. I alternated between a serrated knife and my gerber multi-tool saw blade. Talk about frustrating. Finally, I decided that the risk of slipping and cutting a nearby observer was too great and I went and got a bigger hammer. Figuratively that is. Literally, I got a saw. I came back to the table with a gleam in my eye and a fresh battery. I got the blade in and started cutting. It was beautiful. It was like a knife through butter. Not hot, but not cold. maybe about 60 degrees or so. room temperature if you like it cold or are trying to preserve a body and throw off the time of death for the medical examiner. But I digress. I was careful and finally got the top of the 'kin. And there I found the reason why it was so hard to cut... it was made of gold! Yes it was, wait, no. Well, it turns out it was just really thick-skinned. I'd say it was at least 1/8" thick. probably more but i'm not very good at the maths. less than 1/4 but more than an 1/8. 3/16? maybe? Anyway, everybody was happy. except the pumpkins

I'm not sure using a saw counts as carving

Sigh. somehow I wiped out my blog post. needless to say, using a saber saw on a pumpkin makes for great fun. if anyone cares to hear the whole story, comment and I'll write it up again. Otherwise, just content yourself with knowing that I have pumpkin guts on my saw.

It's so quiet

with only two kids around. I don't feel well (flu-ish) and stayed home and kept Trin and Titus. Trin is so mellow that for the first hour she just sat with me or wandered around. Now that Titus is inside he's playing with her, too roughly, it's a bit louder but still much quieter than all 6. 

Last week we received a generous gift from somebody anonymously. Well, the week before last week. So, last-er week I guess. Anywho, this gift was extremely timely as I had planned some very specific things for Rebekah's birthday But our bank account went dry which was going to seriously dampen my enthusiasm for spending money. Money isn't important to me until I don't have enough to pay my bills and meet my needs then it's very important. So, the money came in and we were able to get somebody to babysit all day. We were gone from 9ish until 7 that night! Pretty wild huh? So we left our 6 urchins with supergirl Hannah and went to the big city of Boise.  After a marvelous fast food breakfast, we then hit the mall in Nampa. I like that mall better. Smaller, less crowded. Even has some guy stores (translation: no clothes).  After rebekah came down from her shopping high we went to goodwill. She got some random stuff there but I found a cool home-made bookshelf for $13! It fit our house perfectly. Rustic, yet sophisticated. Ok, not really. It was a neat design but done by an amateur. Probably some kids shop project. But even with some rough edges, I "fell in love" with it. No. No, I didn't. But I did want it. So, I crammed it in the suburban. Next up on the day of fun was lunch at the Brazilian restaurant Tucanos. Now, I'm not big on ethnic food but the way they do it is very cool. First you pay them lots of money. Then you can eat what you want off the salad "festival" and then they bring meat and stuff around to your table.  It was in a rotation, so you feel a little frustrated at first since you want your food and you want it now, but be patient and they bring some pretty groovy things around. Rebekah was even brave enough to eat a marinated chicken heart! Sheesh. After eating leisurely we left before we were stuffed (imagine that!) and journeyed to the Outlet mall. It was a bit pruned down since we had been there last, but more stores for the little woman at least. I suggested we stop in the Levi's store and that was a mistake. The chick there started trying to "help" us and rebekah threw me to the wolves. I didn't want her help. I was 15 feet away facing away from her and she tries to talk to me. Doesn't she know how this works? Talk to the female companion of the male shopper. She is the intermediary. I don't talk to chicks about clothes unless I know them. Just another example of the moral decay of America I guess <sigh>.

Anyway, things were good and the money was great and now I feel kind of rotten and I have been having headaches. I'm going to go read a book if I can. Thanks for reading, and remember Keep Smiling!

 

Clubbing

I always want to start my blogs with something about clubbing. I'm not sure why, but it's probably because my parents didn't love me enough or they didn't get me the GI Joe w/ the Kung Fu grip or something. Either way, whatever sanity I have sometimes doesn't seem quite enough. God seems to provide (if you're a heathen then I guess insert an empty space where I wrote God) what I need but it's pretty darn close sometimes. The boys have been doing better because we've been keeping a daily accounting of their behavior. If they've been bad they end up w/ a "frowny face" and their reward/punishment is bare bottom spanking. Thankfully, that's been pretty rare because we give them a reality check when I get home. Then they get the opportunity to turn it around but the best they can do for the whole day is and OK. Basically, I define that as "Kids are not small adults, and therefore they will make mistakes and I will not crush their spirits too much." A "smiley-face" is "I about passed out because when I came home my wife wasn't in hysterics and screaming "Why did you do this to me!?!" and I am able to enter the home and go to bed at night w/out almost having a heart attack. Also, you probably did something without being asked and did a good job. Oh, and you ran and got me water whenever I asked for it." 

A frowny face on the other hand is much much grimmer. It consists of the aforementioned hysterical wife with details such as "he said i hate you." or lying and bullying the girls or wanton destruction or some such evil that is wicked (as were we all once) children. I worked with Forrest on proper nouns. Ok, forget all the complicated stuff. Proper nouns are nouns that are always capitalized. Get that, then work on what makes them special. I don't do much w/ helping schoooling (yes an extra o for the extra work) but Forrest was working on greater than/less than. Ya know < & >? I remember being confused on those. I swear I was in sixth grade. What the heck? why was I doing that in sixth grade. I gotta be wrong on that one. Anyway, I finally figured it out so I told forrest to picture the symbol < as pacman eating the bigger number. I drew a partial circle (come on, you can picture it) and threw on some eyeballs. I even added teeth. That seemed to help him a lot and it made it more fun to boot.

Anyway, something is always going on here. Rebekah and I are currently in tense negotiations over Turkey Day. Plans changed since her lazy sister moved away. Right now i'm looking at a multiple-hundred $ expense to drive to Colorado. I will stop now before I get in too much trouble. Rebekah gets these blogs. She's shopping right now while I sit here like a zombie. Granted, a zombie with higher brain function, but still a zombie.

We are also looking at refinancing our house. I'm a little frustrated over homeowners insurance of all things because our house is old. Hopefully we can put that to bed soon. I've committed to an appraisal though so if things go belly up now, i'm on the hook for $500. If not, it'll get rolled into the loan (i think). <groan!> See why driving to Colorado stresses me out? Not to mention the 6 small children and an over ten hour drive. Sanity, I'll see you on the flipside :)

Threats, lies and deceit

another day parenting. I think we do most of the threats with the kids doing the latter two. Some days I worry that we're going to be on nationwide news and not for good sweetness and light reasons. But, I have learned that most parents feel exasperated (that's an understatement) at one time or another. I deal with most of the stress by plugging my ears and yelling "nuh nuh nuh nuh" at the top of my lungs. That's is a small exaggeration. Like lilliputin small. or maybe even only dust mite small. sigh. My poor wife. Can you imagine what she has to go through every day? If we had really docile well behaved children (don't laugh, I think I've seen some demo units before) then it would still be just this side of insane. But no, our kids are typical hellions that hit each other with sticks and get stuff out of the trash and basically behave like drunken frat boys. The girls wouldn't be so bad, but there's two of them and the boys corrupt their sugar and spice into snips and snails. When I was a boy I was offended by that little poem, now I get it and agree with it. I love my boys and they are good kids but the combination of a small house with so many young kids and my wife trying to home school is, to put it bluntly, a nervous breakdown cocktail. I told Rebekah we need to form little bubbles of order amidst the chaos. partition the house. maybe make a DMZ with land mines so she can teach without being pestered. I'm considering all options. Your prayers would be much much coveted. BTW, coveted can be good as well as bad. I mean, you don't have to covet your neighbors wife. Instead, try coveting a nice bell pepper. It's better for you and there's no guilt!

your slightly insane friend,

Grant.

Moving on up

Or something. I just completed the last step to adding a toilet upstairs. Granted there's a lot of finish work left, but a major step has been completed. Of course, tomorrow I'll get a phone call with more screaming than normal and come home to a house reminiscent of Hurricane Katrina. Yes, it's a proud day in this ballard household. Now, if you'll excuse me I must finish watching a show about a serial killer trained to use his craft to right wrongs (not wongs.)

SOS

Save our Sanity... Please. I don't know what else to say.