Complete lack of competence

Or possibly incompetence. Sometimes I am amazed at how bad a father I am. I mean, there is normal mediocrity due to incompetence and then there's the stunned silence due to shock and horror caused by raging incompetence mediocrity. Yep, that's the one that gets you down. Doesn't get me down. So, on this April Fools day in 2012 i acknowledge my incompetence. Sadly, I'm still vastly superior to most other fathers out there. With the possible exception of Bruce Willis. He's probably a bad father too, but he's cool. And that makes up for a lot. Plus he shaves his head. I shaved mine last week. Rebekah was mad at me. Probably still is. I'm not really sure since I haven't talked to her in awhile.

So, just saw a commercial telling kids to play. Pretty wild huh? Never saw that commercial coming. I heard a commercial on an old radio program telling people how bad things were and encouraging the listeners to get involved in their local church or synagogue. Sounded suspiciously like the government advocating religion.

Well, I'm 3 years into my bathrooms/shower project and I only (mostly) have one bathroom done. This lack of progress has inspired me to start working on the other bathroom. So, last week Rebekah and I built a wall and then I closed off the wall to keep the kids out. Then I got a sledge hammer out and broke down the dividing wall between the two bedrooms. The kids loved that. The floor is tongue and groove and over the years the foundation (or something) settled so that part of the floor was/is sloping really bad. So, I had to remove the floor and put sister-joists in. I am still in the process of doing that. Thankfully, I kind of know what I'm doing since I did it once before already. So, instead of prying up and splitting the boards, I used my oscillating tool and my sawz-all to cut the nails. Hopefully, over the next week I can get the floor  put back in. I am going to flip the boards over because the normal side has gooey gunk from the linoleum. We'll see how it goes. Any day now I am going to have to shift modes and start working on stuff outside so I'm trying to get as much done as quickly as possible.

Well, that's all folks.

Sweet Vishnu the Destroyer

or "Fur is Murder?"

which do you prefer for a title? Remember to put the question mark after murder.

I guess you can tell that I'm watching the Simpson's. And because I want to want to watch the Simpsons I am letting the commercials play while I type this. The kids are fascinated with the commercials. We don't watch much regular TV (mostly Netflix) so they're intrigued. Uh oh, now they're watching a monster truck commercial. I'm in trouble now. Anywho, things have been going a bit better. My stomach is mostly back to normal and work is a bit less stressful. Still some major changes and I have to work a couple long Sundays this month, but hey, at least I didn't get nailed by a tornado or anything.

Oooh, and now I'm watching a commercial about Red Lobster and they're talking about Maine. I think I know somebody from there.

Well, the family is mostly finally recovered from their sicknesses. Yes, I know that's not a word. But it's my blog. So, there. Back to the family, we've mostly decided to send Forrest to the New Plymouth school next year. Supposedly, we have the best schools in the area and I think it'll be good for him. Titus will also have to step up and do more while Forrest is at school. After we see how Forrest is doing, we'll probably send Titus. Forrest is our guinea pig I guess. I"m sure he'd love to hear that.

I've started working on enclosing the upstairs bedroom. Then Clelly Belly will sleep in there. Titus can have his room back. Did I mention he lost his room because of setting the girls' hair on fire? Rebekah did a great job helping me this weekend and between that, my awesome skills and my new Dremel  multi max oscillating tool, we got most of it done this weekend. Now I need to buy a door (custom midget height) and move the light switch. Fun with electricity kids. I figure if I  electrocute myself doing that my kids will learn a valuable lesson. Mainly, don't electrocute yourself.

The weather has been nice. But that makes weeds grow. See, I can find the downside in anything :)

bloggidy blog blog

man, i can't tell you how many times I've thought about blogging. But, and you should thank me for this, I abstained. The self pity and drivel that would have emanated would have driven you to despair, spat you out, sucked you back in, digested most of you in its first stomach, and then polished you off in the second stomach. I bet you didn't know that despair had two stomachs did you? Well, consider yourself duly informed.

Yeah, so it's been pretty rough. I've had some frustrating health problems that have caused me a lot of pain. I even hit the ER once just to make sure it wasn't a heart attack. On the postive side, I think that I am getting better. I've lost 20 pounds since the New Year simply because I couldn't eat without pain. I'm slowly eating again and desperately hoping and praying that the pain doesn't come back. So, that's been a big bummer.

Kids are doing well. Rebekah is hanging in there. Sometimes it's more than we think we can take. But, we hang onto the promise that God won't give us more than we can take, although he will push us to the edge sometimes. I know that Bodybuilders that want to gain muscle mass do what is called "lifting to failure." Just so you know, this technique is one of the quickest ways to quit weight training in record time. It hurts! It is so miserable to lift until you can't lift anymore, but that forces the muscle to break down and then build back up stronger than ever before. This past month has been one of the darkest times in my life, but I managed to hang onto my faith. Somehow, when trials come we (me) have this expectation that X duration is ok, but after that we lose hope. God doesn't work that way, and trials like this (where you don't understand what is wrong, how to fix it, or what to do about it) really teach patience. Tribulation worketh patience you know. Lots and lots of patience. Hopefully, if I learn patience the tribulation will take a chill pill and go drink a beer on the beach somewhere. Don't know if it works that way, but one can always hope right?

'nuff said.

What? You're still here?

I thought you would've left a long time ago. I mean, don't you have a family you want to see? No, huh? You don't have a family? Oh, you mean you don't want to see them? Oh. Ok, well, let's get started then.

So, it's almost the end of 2011. Forrest is 8. We've had kids in diapers for 8 years. But recently Rebekah transitioned the little ones to pull-ups. That's somewhat momentous, but we're still trying to finish housebreaking 3 kids. Serenity has a bit of a lazy streak, so Rebekah has been using the paddle to remind her and that has greatly improved her bladder control. Little Clell is actually doing really well. Which is bizarre because he's all boy. Of course, he has trouble pointing but so do all guys (so I hear from women). Trin is funny because she is so gung-ho. I mentioned I needed some socks and she went and found me some. That's happened more than once. Both her and Forrest really thrive by doing stuff for others--well, me.

Last weekend I spent 4.5 hours rerouting our kitchen sink plumbing. Our house is weird because instead of one main line that everything taps into, there are lines for almost ever drain running to the septic tank. Our old 1.5" kitchen sink had been invaded by rust and tree roots so it would plug at the drop of a hat. Or at the drop of some pasta down the garbage disposal. Anyway, I have more work to do but sickness has laid me low. The whole family has been sick, but so far Rebekah and I have been hit hardest.


I've been working a lot. Almost every day. Sometimes late at night or early in the morning. Frustrating. I'm hoping/praying for something else, but for right now this is still where God wants me.

complain complain complain

I played a game a few years ago where I had to take care of people as if I was a god. Of course I was a lower case g god and not very powerful. I seem to remember that I ran out of trees and without trees, well, you're up a creek without a paddle. I also remember how FREAKING WHINY the people were. Fast forward a few years and I can now relate to kids. Man they are whiny. But then I think about myself and man am I WHINY. So, acknowledging there is a problem is the first step to solving it. Or is the first step to solving a problem getting a big club. I'm not sure, but I think I prefer the latter. I think a big part of experience/wisdom is knowing when to whine and when not to. I probably only whine about 95% as much as I used to. I also think a big part of child rearing is beating, I mean training, the whine out of them. I was pondering entitlement the other day and I realized that we are born feeling entitled. My kids feel entitled to watch TV, play the Wii, eat Chinese food, etc. So, it's a constant effort to train them into learning that it's a right, not a privilege. Wait, I think it's the other way around. When I was at the college that will not be named, the authorities used to say that working was a privilege, not a right. Think about that for a second. Society treats work as if it's a burden and if your job sucks Indian Kosher Dill pickles then I get it. But not starving is nice too. Of course, I just found out that the poor can now get cell phones since that's a basic right. Only 70 minutes though. Just laugh. Just laugh or you'll cry.

Rebekah is off shopping. BTW, my touchpad wants to turn Rebekah into DEborah so if you see that in here, no I am not cheating. I don't have the desire, money, time, energy, desire, soul of a serpent, etc. To cheat. I'm sitting here with the girls watching Fineas and Pherby  or something. All I know is my touchpad keeps wanting to auto-correct it to something else. Sigh. Ain't technology great. But I was amused that the Platypus did a HALO jump which is high altitude low opening. See, you can learn things from inane cartoon shows. Liberty just said to me "I want more." No please, just a demand. See what I was saying about entitlement??

The boys and I went to Fairfield this last weekend and together with Melodie and her two Kids, Curtis and his boy, and Tyler and his two oldest and Mom and Dad we climbed up a hill and dug up a time capsule that we had buried a little over 20 years ago. In the process we learned how pirates lost their treasure. Dad made good instructions but it's amazing how 20 years later you can end up a few feet off digging through roots and rock for naught. Thankfully, Tyler saved the day with this memory and perception and found a rock that matched one in the picture. So, we only dug two holes. We left one as a "decoy" hole.  We meant to do that. Really. What do you mean you don't believe me? Aaah, Libby just "asked" me. Now she's saying please. I am such a mean Dad.

Let me leave you with a phrase I remember seeing on a sign in grade school: "Stupidity is not a virtue."

Bigger is better

wow. It's been a rough week for me. Work has been crazy stressful. Thankfully, I think I'm 95% ready for winter.

I was looking at Titus and noticed how big he's getting. It's a bit sad to be so busy and overwhelmed so much of the time I don't enjoy my kids like I would like to. Oh well, hopefully they'll take care of me when I'm old and infirm. I give that about two weeks. I guess I figure old age was something that didn't really start to happen until, well, older. But when I hit 30 I started having trouble with my tendons. That seems to be one of my biggest problems. My foot hurts pretty bad at times because the tendon is sore. Doesn't seem to want to heal. I  guess that's why some people start to live on ibuprofen. My brother Curtis' Father-in-law died before expected and I think one of the reasons was because he took a lot of ibuprofen. Most people get slowed down by stomach pain first.

Argh. I don't like winter. I don't like to say hate, or I probably would. But at least winter keeps bugs and weeds down. But kids are cooped up. Less sun, blah blah blah. I did hear about a light used for Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD. Somebody has a morbid sense of humor). I think it's called a blue light or something. But if you use that apparently it helps you wake up, so even if you're not "sad" you can use that for a natural boost. Go find it on amazon. It seems to work, the problem is it's expensive. Isn't that always the way?

Life is hard and getting harder. But, before we ever had kids I knew that I wanted my kids and my family to NOT have everything. When I was growing up I remember not having butter (or margarine) and drinking milk was a luxury. You'd think that would scar me. I spose it did, but in the reverse way. I was not spoiled & it was good for me to do without. It makes you push yourself & learn to do things yourself. And that means your kids have to participate in the family. Recently, I bought some fruit firewood. The boys worked hard with minimal yelling. Time was of the essence because daylight was waning. So, hopefully my kids learn and apply some of the great lessons that I was privileged to learn when I was growing up.

Yes Virginia, I am that awesome

So, nice to talk to you again. I've missed you. Why don't you call? Or write? Or text? I do have unlimited texts ya know. I mean, back in the day when it cost money to make a phone call outside of your city I understood that you were just cheap, but now? Now I just think you don't really  like me very much. But that's ok, because I don't like you very much either. I mean, I have a life you know. Why right now I'm sitting in my easy chair typing out a message on some bloggy thingy. I mean, I'm a busy man. I don't have time to say, put a stamp on a letter that's been written for over ten years. But even if I did, there's no way (no freaking way) that I could muster up the time to walk it out to my mail box. But even if I did have time, there's no way I have the energy to walk 50 feet and risk getting hit by a drunk Harley rider returning from the local steakhouse. I mean, are you really so selfish that you want my kids to go childless? How dare you! I am not sure how you sleep at night. Tell you what, let's just let our relationship atrophy into a dried husk of a once plump and juicy friendship. Just like that snake-skin we found outside by the wood pile.

[The preceding was a public service announcement meant to nobody and everybody about nothing (not everything) regarding nothing (not everything). It wasn't meant with malice aforethought unless I change my mind and then it was. Oh, and in case you're really really dense this is just a funny blog post in my twisted and corrupt mind. But if you're that dense,  you probably aren't reading this anyway which means I'm killing precious bits and bytes. I'm gonna stop now]

Too tired to care

Oh long day. At work we had our first go live w/ SAP. It was for payroll and even though I'm not involved directly we had to do a lot of support. So, I finally got out of there around 7:30.

Rebekah is frustrated with the school setup that we have. It's k-12 which is free which is nice and has some accountability which is good, but they keep making it harder on mom's. It's getting more and more rigid. Now the boys are supposed to have a bunch of meetings which is a waste of time. I told Rebekah if it's not something we can avoid or work around we'll just have to do something else, which of course means more money which we don't have for curriculum. Man, it just keeps getting better. Oh, wait, no it doesn't. Oh, I was being sarcastic. I told you I was tired.

The kids are doing well though. Rebekah isn't quite as well off. She hurt her shoulder somehow, and it has been slow healing. I bought her a sling the other day but it's hard for her to stay immobile for long.

I think I'm going to go to sleep now.

The liberty and i

last night I went outside to work on stacking some wood. I didn't have a lot left and didn't want to deal with kids so I figured I would just do it all myself. But then I looked behind me and saw liberty was trailing. I didn't think anything of it and went out and started putting little pieces of wood in a wheel barrow. As I was working I noticed Libby all on her own start picking up wood and putting it in the wheel barrow as well. I kept working and she kept working. When I started unloading she handed me the wood. When I gave her instructions she obeyed the first time. She was the perfect little helper. She got two pieces of mom's special chocolate as a reward. Where was serenity you ask? She was inside playing some educAtional game keeping the babies distracted. Where were the boys? Riding their bikes around outside. I wonder if all boys are lazy? I know I was and still am.

old man winter

is on the way. But, why is it a man? After all, aren't women known for their frigidity? (psst I don't think that's a word.) Unfortunately, either way winter is coming and I am not ready yet. Rebekah and I spent a lot of time over the past month cutting up wood from various trees and branches as well as burning a massive brush pile. That was a little scary because there was so much brush that if it got away from us we could have very easily suffered a building meeting its untimely demise. We had the hose ready and tried to clear away burn lines so we could burn just a little bit at a time. Sounds good in theory, but the wind makes fools of us all... Well maybe just people trying to burn brush. Anyway, it was going nicely, but then the wind picked up and started to push our existing burn into another pile. That displeased me greatly so I desperately tried to wet it down but it was burning so fiercely that I decided that it was scary so I frantically sprayed it down until we finally got it way way down. And then the wind died. It was mocking me. Daring me. It knew that time was of the essence  and I needed to burn the brush as fast as possible. But did I dare? Yes I did. I fooled it by burning the pile on the other side of the direction rate wind was blowing. That way I didn't have to worry about the fire encroaching on my turf. Needless to say, after a long day I emerged victorious. But we still have to get wood to burn, oil to burn, pellets to burn (I like to have options) a chimney to clean and repair and some wood to split. So, you can see why I prefer 100 degree days over winter.

the kids and family are doing good. Some mild sickness right now, but not too bad. School has started so of course my wife is ready to throttle somebody, but that's to be expected. I think that I just measure time in when something got broken. I finally fixed our burned countertop. That was damaged five years ago by someone that I will not name to protect the guilty. I replaced a section of our stupid cheap counter with a butcher block. But I can't keep up. Within the past week the kids have damaged 4 separate items. But I guess that's part of being a parent. I will send them an itemized bill later.

aacch!

watching some stupid cartoon and the statue of liberty sounds like Rosie Perez. I'm typing this on rebekahs touchpad. A neat device but I will take a physical keyboard over virtual any day. The funny thing about the touchpad is that HP killed it and discounted it 66% and then it took off. Ironically,HP wanted to be the number2 tablet and in death the touchpad achieved their goal.

well, I just got back from Vegas. I had a conference there. I was surprised how cool I thought it was. I can't adequately describe it, but for a guy who doesn't indulge in the "sin" of "sin city" I thought it was pretty cool. Just don't take anything from the guys on the streets because they aren't tracts. But when I thought I couldn't be impressed any more I found something else cool. Have you ever ridden on a circular escalator before, thought not. Well, breakfast is calling so remember what happens in Vegas will haunt you the rest of your life.

Titus stepped n a nail today. thankfully he was (at least) wearing sandals. Half the time the kids run around like indians w/out shoes. I think it's mostly just laziness on their part. But Titus stepped on the nail and squawked. I looked over and for awhile I thought he had just hurt his foot. But as I watched him he started really crying. That's when I figured out he had stepped on a nail. Then I was mad as I wondered where the nail came from and how I had missed and left a board around for the kids to step on. Then I got mad because I realized that Titus had been hammering nails into a board and he stepped on one of his. Needless to say, I'm not the parent you come to for sympathy. Of course, my Dad wasn't really sympathetic either. Although he probably was nicer than I am.

All I remember about our trip to Canada was that it was expensive, they didn't have free refills standard, and I felt more comfortable in Buffalo than in friendly Ontario. Oh, and their money is silly. I mean, pictures of kids playing hockey and sledding? Give me a break! But the kids actually traveled pretty well. Much better than I expected. Of course, that probably had something to do with the Nitrous Oxide we pumped through the vents (we wore gas masks).

I've been watching the Top Gear (UK) and it's very interesting. I find it amazing that we don't share so many words and phrases. Although I find it annoying to see how much resentment there is towards America on a show such as that. It's subtle but pervasive. I actually have seen far more negative comments about Americans than French which disappointed me. Cheese eating surrender monkeys are so much fun to mock. Considering they review more French vehicles than American it seems applicable. Oh well, it just reinforces my belief that all other countries have "USA Envy."

I need to go take a shower as I am still somewhat covered in sawdust. Toodles.

Oh Canada!

Our home and and native land, something something something, something something something. Although I'm confused. I thought it was the "native american's" land. And if so, what are they doing in Canda for Zeus' sake? I mean, it seems a bit silly. Oh, I suppose you can argue that yes, it is North America but everybody knows that "America" is slang for USA. Try using it in some other fashion (even out of country) and I'll bet you have some confused people. Anyway, my summations are as follows after my brief exposure. 1. People are fairly nice. I mean compared to New Yorkers who I interacted with yesterday. But heck, everybody is nice compared to New Yorkers. I bet the Taliban are of a sweeter disposition than NY'ers. OK, maybe that's not super fair. I really only interacted with a few yelling at us where to park. They actually had people flagging us away from the park parking lot. I didn't realize that's what they were doing until later. I would've been highly irritated (slightly above my normal state) but they did save us $5 and we didn't have to walk that much farther. So, Arrogant New Yorkers: 1. But then Rebekah and I hunted down a Pita Gourmet so we could get some Gyros. The Chick taking our order was rude to everybody. Irritated Tourist: 1. But then, the guys making the food did an awesome job and went out of our way to be very considerate. So much so that I told the guy he was "awesome." I bet you don't get told that everyday by a stranger do you? So, all in all I like New York better.

Our trip has been enjoyable but expensive. Our hotel was a good deal and is nice. But prices at the Denny's next door are literally twice what we pay at home. So, we haven't been to Denny's yet. Add tip and taxes (about 20%) and most meals are around $40. thankfully, we've avoided most of the tourist traps, so our meals have been good. We did find free refills at a fast food joint and there was one family restaurant that was advertising free refills. It's amazing to me how much being able to drink four cups of coffee or three glasses of iced tea means to me when I can't have it.

We went over to the US side yesterday. That was interesting. The border guard asked specific questions which were polite but a little unnerving. I forgot our hotel's name for a minute, but Rebekah knew it. Coming back though was a little odder. The Canadian dude was very cool. Wanted to know why we went over the US side. all reasonable questions, just a little hostile. maybe he doesn't like americans. Wouldn't surprise me.

So, last day of away from kids vacation. gonna check out a cable car ride. Ideally, the cables are nice and sturdy. If not, I love you Mom and Dad. Have fun with the kids!

Moving right along

Well, today didn't quite turn out the way I expected but it went well anyway. I had planned for something to break up the routine of the day but that fell through. So, I finished some cosmetic issues with the sink, watched a couple movies and then, finally, got to work on hooking up the swamp cooler. It was pretty easy to hook up the evaporative cooler to the thermostat. All I need to do now is figure out where to put the thermostat in the house. Since all I have to do is run one wire (with 4 small wires in that one) to a suitable location. I hadn't eaten much all day except for some cheetos in the morning (shhh. don't tell my Dad. that's one of his pet peeves :) but finally cooked up some corn dogs. That's the extent of my cooking. I have fish sticks but don't want to use the oven. Takes too long and that sucker has burned me before. So, now I"m sitting here kind of bleary eyed watching Glengary Glen Ross which is supposed to be fantastic. It's about real-estate. But I like to think that I can enjoy a thinking mans movie. Although I'm not sure how watching a bunch of cranky salesmen having a bad-luck streak is haute couture. Well, that's probably a misuse of a stupid French term, but you get the idea. Anywho, I guess things are still going well for Rebekah and the kids. Lots of fun. Cell service is not so good at the house. It's got a metal roof and the exterior is stone so that pretty much bounces all cell signals off. When i talked to her a bit ago she was outside sitting on the swing. Then her phone was running out of juice so she had to go. I'm starting to get suspicious. I guess the shoe is on the other foot a bit. Normally, she wants to talk to me but I'm at work and busy. Well, Church is tomorrow and unfortunately so is Father's day. I don't normally care or pay any attention to it, but apparently other people do. I guess that's all for now.

One week down (almost)

Rebekah has been gone for almost a week. I am sitting here watching a movie after spending my third evening working on putting in a new (well, salvaged) sink It's finally done. I hope. Took me the better part of eight hours which sounds ridiculous. If you look at those DIY books they might say two hours. Well, let me tell you something. It might take you two hours if you know exactly where all your tools are. It might take you only two hours if you have a replacement sink that fits the existing hole perfectly (I didn't). It might take you only two hours if you didn't have to spend an hour chiselling caulk off. It might take you only two hours if the "new" sink wasn't tweaked and you didn't have to try to bend it, fit it, bend it, fit it, bend it, fit it, bend it, fit it, and then say "fugedaboutit" and call it good enuf. It might take you only two hours if you had all necessary sink lugs/clips and some idea on how to use them. It might take you two hours if you didn't keep dropping the sink clips. It might take you only two hours if you didn't have some clips that were straight drive and new clips that were phillips so you had to switch back and forth. It might take you only two hours if you didn't have... oh I give up. You get the idea.

This week hasn't been too bad. A bit lonely but I've kept busy with the sink project and life in general. I've stayed busy and work so between the two it hasn't been as bad as I expected. I don't miss the kids as much unless I actually see some wee ones on TV or something. I'm very good at being oblivous, so I am leveraging this expertise to the hilt. I think I have some entertainment plans tomorrow so after I verify the sink is good I'll tear into my swamp cooler. Our old one of probably 50 years or so finally could not be patched any more. So, I'm hooking up another one that someone gave us a few years ago. This wouldn't be a big deal, but I bought a thermostat for it on clearance and it's pretty sophisticated. It'll auto turn on and switch from cool to fan and it'll handle both speeds. So, it's pretty cool but it's a project for sure.

Somehow Rebekah made it to Michigan alive. I guess the kids did pretty well which is a major blessing. But because they did two crazy long days (not consecutive thankfully) she was really exhausted.

ok, well, that's my check in for now. I'm ready to pass out, so i'm gonna put the computer down before it falls on the floor.

Stress

I feel myself growing older. Work has been very stressful and isn't showing any sign of letting up. Rebekah and the kids are leaving soon which I'm not very thrilled about. I think most husbands would be thrilled to have the house to themselves for two weeks. I've got lots of things to do that are frustrating to work on around kids, but I'm not sure which to focus on. Do I work upstairs on my bathroom project which has been largely on hold for the past two months? Or work on miscellaneous household items? Or this, or that? I'll figure something out. I spent the biggest chunk of today putting in a pulpit mic at church. Cutting holes in a $2000 pulpit makes me nervous. I also had to splice some pieces together, but I think the end result is quality and looks well. Doesn't work, but hey, it looks good. No, it works, but we need an off switch for the pulpit mic. didn't even think about that until Pastor mentioned it. Oh well, he just have to move it out of the way when he talks. The pulpit mic is for me and my glorious voice as I lead the congregation in singing. Without me, they would mill about like cats. Yes, I am the cat whisperer. Or herder. Or something. I'm quite tired right now and watching "Men who stare at Goats." Well, I'm more listening to it because it's hard to think creatively while watching a movie. Oh, and point of accuracy regarding this movie-if you're supposedly in Iraq and you steal an old pickup it will NOT be one of the big three. It will be a Nissan or some other product of Godzilla's home town NOT Motor City. Watch the news sometime. I'm right.

Will someone tell my wife to stop harassing me? I give up.

I vant to suck your bloood!

Went to Dr. today for a variety of reasons. But, the fun part is always getting my blood sucked out. I should really ask for it back when they're done, but I have a hunch they'd give me a strange look and then say, "Are you kidding me?" At which point, I'd have to smile and say "Of course! nobody would seriously ask such a thing." All the while plotting their demise for making me feel stupid for wanting part of me back. While I was in the office today the Dr. was tapping on my face (don't ask) and I was thinking that my mom (when I was lil) my wife (when I was big) and my Dr. (lil and big) all get to invade that private space where I (we) normally scream out "No touchie!" But now, we can add the wonderful folks at the TSA. I am looking forward to flying in June.

Springtime. Sheesh. Rough spring. Winds so strong that I occasionally have to chase my kids down as they start blowing away. Today it was 80 degrees and people were complaining. I like hot. hot doesn't cost me money. cold costs me money. If you're hot take your clothes off. Close the curtains though, cause you don't want to have to register as a sex offender. Then if you're still hot, get an ice cube and rub it up and down between your WOOPS! Sorry, got a little carried away there. Too busy getting ready for stuff. sometimes my brain gets tired and wanders off where it shouldn't.

In about 4 weeks the fam is leaving for Michigan. God speed I say. I will be alone for two weeks and then I (hopefully) will fly to Detroit and meet Rebekah. Then we will go to Niagra falls via Canadia. What about the kids? We're boarding them. Why niagra falls? Cause. that's why. Will I be lonely while they're gone? Sure, but I can blast music loud. Watch movies loud. Whatever whatever loud. OH, and I have a class and a test to take while they're gone so I'm planning on cramming my brain full of tech knowledge that will be out of date within a couple months.

Oh, and I am doing a customer presentation at a local user group. There's only about 100 people there. I hope I'm not nervous. I have decided that the best way to not be nervous is to simply not give a flying rutabaga. Forget this preparation thing. I'll psych myself out if I do that.

I need to find a hobby. this life thing is burning me out.

stabby stabby

So, there I was in Home Depot, and I'm going through Dexter withdrawals and I just had to see some blood and nobody else was in the aisle so, sigh, i was forced to go all stabby on myself. Not my prefered outlet, but much less prison time go I guess it was a win-win after all. In truth, I was trying to unscrew a setscrew from an ancient door-knob and the screw was, well, less than its self (translation: it was half broken). And of course, I was using my knife as a screwdriver which doesn't sound quite as stupid as you might think. Anywho, push came to shove and I pushed hard and shoved the knife right off the screw into the "meaty" part of my left hand. My first thought was "#!@." My second thought was "Dang, that blood is dark." My third thought was "Dang, I hope I don't faint." My fifth thought was, "What kind of wuss faints at a little blood?" My sixth thought was, "How'd I get down here?" Ok, not really. I didn't faint, but I did feel a little woozy as it was late in the day and I hadn't had lunch yet. So, tried to cup my hand to keep the blood from spilling and getting biohazard response from a bunch of orange-aproned dudes yelling "Swarm Swarm!" I scurried to the bathroom as casually as one can when one is scurrying while holding a handful of blood and burst into the mens room only to find NO PAPER TOWELS! Argh! They had those stupid commie hand dryers. That's great if I want to redecorate the bathroom in a red mist but my goal was containment, not spreading the crimson contagion. So, after spinning around wildly I go to a stall and quickly debate of trying to spin enough paper off those toilet paper misers or grab one of those sani-thingies for the toilet. I decide on the sani-thingy and use it to staunch the flow of blood. Then I wandered over to a nest of aprons and thankfully got a guy who wordless got my band-aid. And then, some women saw me. Thankfully, my tough exterior kept them from voicing their concern to a minimum. Although, as I was walking around later a woman asked me how my hand was. As far as I know I was able to capture all of it but for a couple drops which I cleaned up later. Then I gave up and went and bought a new door knob. So ended my adventure @ home depot.

3 little piggies

I mean daughters. and in no way am i implying that they're pigs. Well, libby likes her Ramen but not a pig by any means. So, I am watching Dexter, ya know the show about the happy go lucky serial killer, Well, not happy go lucky but a serial killer with a heart. Well, not that either. Ok, well, all the judging aside on why I'm watching such a sick show (try it, I dare you) I was watching an episode and a guy (not Dexter) told his daughter that he wished she'd never been born. And wouldn't you know it, I found some emotions. Buried underneath some peanut shells (i was snacking earlier) I found something kind of shriveled and dried up. I think it's an emotion, not really sure. But I felt some weird pang when I picked it up. Not sure what it was for sure, but I suddenly felt a compelling need to go hug my daughters. So I went upstairs in the dark. I went in the girls room and I could hear Liberty and Serenity but then I felt some little creature near my feet grabbing at me. I leaned down (I can't see anything mind you) and felt around and found some hair and then a little face and then some arms. So I picked her up and then I could tell for sure it was a Trinity! Needless to say I then went and sat down on the bed and hugged and kissed all the girls until that first emotion thingy went away.

Tough Enough

So, time seems to speed up as you get older. I just turned 35. I wish I didn't feel old, but I have ever since I turned 30. I started having problems with my wrists about that time so this marks the 5 year mark of wrist pain. I think it's tendinitis in the wrists w/ inflammation but all Dr.'s want to see is carpal tunnel even though the symptoms are wrong. Nobody once suggested tendinitis even though the symptoms fit. anyway, I just pray it doesn't get any worse.

Well, we got a new pastor for our church. Our last one, my brother in law, left about 6 months ago. Thankfully we had a guy to preach who is very good. The new guy is ex-USAF so he's got a pension which is a huge relief. We will still be tight on things financially @ the church though because we are losing one family. But, it's God's church and I just have to figure out how I fit into that properly.

Trinity burned herself today on our wood stove. Out of all the kids, she was the last I would've suspected. But, she backed into it and fell down. Her burn is pretty bad, but I came home from work and helped Rebekah put Vitamin E on it and it doesn't seem to be hurting her too much. She's such a sweety. She will just sit with me for what seems like hours. Forrest has said to me that I love her the most. No, I don't, although I may show her the most affection. But that's simply because she is the sweetest. "like" is relative and I like some of my kids more than others at different times. But I try to not favor one and if I have been spending more time with the girls and Clell. Titus is probably getting the short end, but to be honest he is more interested in watching TV than saying goodbye when I'm leaving. But that's ok, he's a kid. He's a good kid and he loves to help me do things. I caught him upstairs in the bathroom after light's out and he was "cleaning." So, I told him good job, pointed somethings out to him that he could work on and left him.

Several people have told me that this is the best time of my life. This may be true, but I've heard from other people that College was the best time of their life. I haven't had the best "time" of my life yet that I know of. I love my family, but Rebekah and I are beaten down with trying to take care of them, our old ancient house and property, our vehicles, friendships, and the the church. I really hope this isn't the best time of my life, but if it is then I'm grateful because although life is challenging I have never been so happy.